Category Archives: intention-setting

To-Do List Hypermode

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I’m excited to tell you that my next post will be from Croatia!

I’m looking forward to meanders by the sea, exploring hiking paths with gorgeous lakes and waterfalls, old towns with narrow alleys and medieval buildings. Most of all, I’m looking forward to a break from my life’s nurturing but relentless to-do list, even as I know that all those to-dos in my regular life will somehow seem much sweeter and more meaningful on my return.

Meanwhile I’ve been scurrying around for the past few days in “To-Do List Hypermode,” trying to get things done that I don’t want left hanging when I get back in early May. Already, I know I have to figure out a way of giving myself dispensation because I know won’t get to all of it, and sadly, a lot of the administrative and deeper household maintenance tasks that I often put off for months will likely still be waiting for me. In the meantime, I’ve done the things that feel more essential and time-sensitive, like drafting a thank-you letter to our fabulous Congressman, Jim McGovern, for his unannounced visit to the Burlington ICE office/detention holding facility last week, writing an article for our immigration justice newsletter, and starting on an agenda for the next monthly meeting of our regional immigration advocacy network, which I’ll miss, but am still committed to helping with planning.

And I completed my April writing submissions goals (I usually aim for around 10/month).

I also planted the peas this morning. It’s a bit early, but if I wait until I come back, it will be too late. This involved digging up and composting a big chunk of my cover crop, covering the peas with seed cover to protect them from the birds, and carpeting the rest of the exposed area with as much cardboard as I had to keep the weeds from a three-week party.

I could list tons of other stuff that’s still a hopeful maybe on my list. And that doesn’t even include the essentials of packing, acquiring last minute stuff we need, using up perishables in the fridge, and making sure the house is tidy enough for our friend who is coming to live here and take care of Andre the cat. But I’m trying to let myself off the hook for most of it. What did I write about a few weeks ago: calm, balanced, focused…? So much of my battle with myself is to stick with the task at hand, rather than get distracted by something else.

Of course, weekly blogging is always on the to-do list. So, I’m glad to get this task checked off, even if this isn’t the most profound blog I’ve ever written. It’s an interesting process, trying to figure out what to blog on each week. I usually get to a topic by thinking about what’s gone on in the past week (either in my own life and/or in the wider world) and then–hopefully–connecting that incident or event to some bigger theme related to art for change, writing, activism, or a niggling question about the universe that I hope others share.

But today, it’s just about that endless to-do list and the way it gets so bloated before traveling. I guess that might be universal–our inclination not to leave too much undone. I do take solace in the fact that the minute I get on the plane, the memory and thoughts of what I didn’t do will disappear like wisps of cloud sinking far below my view-scape.

At least, until I get back home…

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Calm, balanced, and focused

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Daily intention-setting has become a regular practice for me. And I’ve finally managed to veer away from the laundry list of all I’d might like to get done to more helpful guiding questions like: How would I like to feel today? Or, With what qualities will I approach my day? Sometimes I lean into joy, or appreciation, or kindness. But what comes up more than anything else are three words: calm, balanced, and focused.

Calm has never been my modus operandi. And I may have even convinced myself at various points in my life that it was fine not to be calm, because too much calmness would flatten the angsty juice that drives my writing and other modes of creative expression. But especially in the last ten years, as my anxiety and blood pressure increased and I began to feel world issues on a more visceral level, the absence of calm began to feel like a tunnel in the shelter I built around myself that kept widening, leaving a clear path for termites.

Calm by Nick Youngson CC BY-SA 3.0 Alpha Stock Images

Still, it’s hard to both lean into calm and also to feel the pain of all that’s askew in the universe. How many violent videos and horrible news stories can we take in before feeling flat and numb? It took me a while to realize that calm is not the same as numb, and that I could let myself feel and acknowledge painful realities without having to feel subsumed by them. In fact, being calm has made me a better activist, and I no longer fault myself for putting down the phone, and choosing not to read a particular post or article because I’ve had enough.

What this is about is being balanced. While I certainly take in my share of bad news and many times find myself ensconced in the sadness of either a personal or worldly situation, I’m at my best when I can stay out of overwhelm and balance my emotional responses with steady and thoughtful action. Balance also means tempering my day by adding nurturing and self-care to the things I put on my task list. And it also means balancing my expectations because I never get everything done on my task list!

And being balanced also means applying a steady focus on whatever I’m doing, rather than being distracted and trying to too many things at once–which, of course affects my ability to stay calm. And I’ll admit, right now, I’m feeling a bit frenetic because I only have 45 minutes to revise and post this blog before I’m called to other tasks that have times assigned to them for the rest of the evening. And I’ll also admit that I haven’t been very focused while writing this, as I keep veering off to answer emails or texts, or check social media. Intentions, at best, are aspirations that aren’t always met. So in addition to addressing my tendency to distract myself instead of focusing, I also need to be gentle–if firm–when corralling myself back to the task at hand, without beating myself up with a barrage of self-criticism.

Despite not always fulfilling my intentions, I find setting them useful. Because the ratio of calm/focus/balance to frenetic/distracted/overwhelmed has definitely increased–significantly–just by putting forth the desire. And the best is when I notice times that I’m deliberately cultivating calm and focus and choosing to ignore the urges toward reactiveness and self-distraction bubbling up inside me.

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